Thank you so much to everyone that shared their thoughts and testimonies with me. It has helped me so much to hear that you all really -truly- firmly believe in the gospel and have strong testimonies of it. I said I was searching for my "ahh ha"...searching for what my testimony really is. Last Friday (when I wrote that blog looking for answers) was the worst day of my life. I hope I never have another day that even comes close to that one. My sister and cousin both attend BYU-Idaho. They were driving to Utah for the weekend so my sister could start looking for a job as she is almost done with school. They were south of Pocatello when a moose ran out in front of them. I'm not going to blog very much about this as it is so very devastating. My cousin died at the scene and my sister somehow had minor injuries. Heavenly Father has a plan for each of us and it is His will in our lives. We have this time on earth to learn and to grow and to repent. This is our test...the reason we are here on this earth. I know that Heavenly Father loves each of us individually and he doesn't allow things to happen to hurt us. I am devastated by the loss of my cousin but I know that I can see her again and that our loving Heavenly Father has other plans for her than what we expected or wanted. It is His will and he knows better than us and we need to understand and trust in that. My amazing beautiful sister has such a strong and firm testimony of the gospel and as fearful of seeing people and causing lots of attention as she was she so badly wanted to attend sacrament meeting and partake of the sacrament. She just amazes me. We went to her ward for sacrament meeting and one of the hymns we sang was I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go. This was a very hard song for me to sing but it was sweet and helped me so much. I am grateful to have the gospel in my life and I'm grateful for the knowledge we have of eternal families. I don't think our families could get through this time if we didn't have the gospel. I am so grateful I still have my Lisa. I can't say more about this as my heart is so full. She is amazing and beautiful and I love her so much. I am so grateful I got to drive out with my parents to get her. My arms just ached to hold her. She is so strong and we will all get through this.

It may not be on the mountain height or over the stormy sea,
It may not be at the battle's front My Lord will have need of me.
But if, by a still, small voice he call To paths that I do not know,
I'll answer, dear Lord, with my hand in thine: I'll go where you want me to go.

I'll go where you want me to go, dear Lord, Over mountain or plain or sea;
I'll say what you want me to say, dear Lord; I'll be what you want me to be.

Perhaps today there are loving words Which Jesus would have me speak:
There may be now in the paths of sin Some wand'rer whom I should seek.
O Savior, if thou wilt be my guide, Tho dark and rugged the way,
My voice shall echo the message sweet: I'll say what you want me to say.

I'll go where you want me to go, dear Lord, Over mountain or plain or sea;
I'll say what you want me to say, dear Lord; I'll be what you want me to be.

There's surely somewhere a lowly place in earth's harvest fields so wide
Where I may labor through life's short day For Jesus, the Crucified.
So trusting my all to thy tender care, And knowing, thou lovest me,
I'll do thy will with a hear sincere: I'll be what you want me to be.

I'll go where you want me to go, dear Lord, Over mountain or plain or sea;
I'll say what you want me to say, dear Lord; I'll be what you want me to be.